The inner conflict of being an up and coming Indie Developer

   Making games is something I've always wanted to do,  since first playing an Atari 2600 back in the day.   No matter what I was doing, this idea always lingered in the back of my head since the age of 10.  Now here I am, about to be 30, and working to make this dream a reality.  I always knew it was going to be tough,  but never knew it was this tough.  Game Development is no easy process,  but it's also one of the most rewarding (when things actually work).
 
  So far in the past year and a half,  Critter Box (game studio I co-founded with a friend) has tried 3 different projects.  While we have not commercially released anything yet,  with each passing project I've learned more and improved.  Now, prior to this venture,  my computer programming skills were lacking... completely, as in I had none.  I have never went to school for any of these things,  what I do know I've learned on my own.  To some people that might sound like a nightmare,  but I actually feel it's helped me learn much more at my own pace and in my own way.  I've also been doing some Pixel Art,  which is something I'm learning as I go.  One thing I know for sure now,  making games takes a ton of work and dedication.  But,  once things start working out,  it's an awesome feeling to see things start to come together. Something I'm sure anyone creating something from nothing can understand.

   My biggest challenges in Game Development so far have been finding the right people with the same level of passion and vision as me,  and finding the funding to pay said people.  I'm also hyper critical of myself so anything I do never feels good enough, that's not to say I'm not proud of things I've done either.  It's more frustration that what I've done and what I see in my head can be wildly different,  which in turn can make me a little crazy.  Critter has tried to get it's games funded in the past (on 3 occasions, one going on right now) and they did not meet with success.  I think back to these times and wonder now if that was how it was meant to be.  There is something about our current project that ignites a different feeling in me,  in that I really want to finish this and see it be, regardless of success.   RPGs are a favored game type to me and hey, Zombies are awesome as well.   These two combined seemed like a no brainer to me.   I'm hoping to come back to this post in the future (after the Long Night is finished),  to be proud of my creation and the work others have done on it.

   I know that even though Indie Development is tough,  I still sit here day in and day out.  Coding and creating to get closer to my goal of finishing this project.  It's a personal reward as no one is here to pat me on the back or say good job,  but it still makes me feel good inside when I see my work advance every day.

   This was my way of starting out this blog.  Although I'm also going to do things like Game Reviews, thoughts on upcoming things,  LISTS!!!, and updates to any projects I'm working on.  Thanks everyone for reading!

Here's a link to the Long Nights Kickstarter page:
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1213561552/the-long-night-a-zombie-apocolypse-rpg